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The sun is shining, the birds are chirping their little hearts out and we get this edition of Labor Day Monday Screencaps rolling with a recap of a weekend that will be remembered as the weekend where we learned that the clock that we see during football games isn't the official...official game clock, if you're watching Big Ten football.
Am I mad that Michigan won? Not at all. I LOVE that Michigan won like that because of the mental gymnastics that these fans have going on in their heads. I LOVE that the supposedly smart Michigan students, the coastal elites, rushed the field after beating Western Michigan. In fact, I'm tempted to get a photo of the field rush framed for my basement.
Look at all the people on the field after one of the most important wins in Michigan history. Rockwell couldn't have painted it better.
– Anonymous writes: Michigan is to the point they can't help themselves from cheating - new coach, same old same old. If they'd missed that second Hail Mary, I have no doubt they would have gotten a third chance. No way the B1G 10 is allowing one of its four marquee programs to lose to second-tier school.
Kinsey: To be fair, Michigan didn't cheat. They just got the benefit of the super-secretive game clock that fans don't get to see. This is absolutely the best thing that could ever happen this season to my profession. Do you realize how many game clock questions will be asked this season, especially late in games? This is the stuff that keeps my, and many, many others employed.
CLOCK CONTROVERSY ALLOWS MICHIGAN WOLVERINES TO AVOID MASSIVE UPSET AGAINST WESTERN MICHIGAN
It provides us with memes. It provides us with content for Dan Dakich to talk about. It provides us with content for months.
And this keeps Bryce Underwood as the Michigan QB. Saturday was great.
NOTRE DAME CAVES, LIVES UP TO MARCUS FREEMAN'S PROMISE AS USC RIVALRY GAME IS OFFICIALLY BACK
– Eric P. emails: Can u start a thread on your great website that asks why there are the decrepit retirees involved in rule explanations? They are not only wrong more often than one would expect; they offer nothing to improve the broadcasts, other than to allow me to say what dumb asses they are.
Kinsey: I was completely shocked last night when Terry McAulay, working on Notre Dame's broadcast, actually said Notre Dame didn't deserve the ball after a punt fumble. I'm not a Notre Dame fan by any stretch, but it sure felt like the NBC crew was leaning towards Wisconsin early in that game. I couldn't have been the only one to catch that.
TEXAS TECH HEAD COACH BLASTS USC, LINCOLN RILEY, FOR POOR ATTENDANCE AT LA COLISEUM IN WEEK ZERO
By the way, Labor Day weekend needs better matchups, but we're not going to get them. Indiana showed us the way by scheduling cupcakes for the first three weeks. Look at what USC scheduled this fall. San Jose State, Fresno State and Louisiana. If the goal is to just make the playoffs, why schedule tough out of the gates?
Bonus: Remember when ESPN cameras would catch fans in the stands and Internet dorks didn't act like it was a crime against humanity? Guys, let's act like it's 2010 again. ESPN cameras spotting hot fans in the stands is NORMAL.
I've seen too many Internet dorks banging on the cameraman for this shot. This is the college football that I love.
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– Marc is back and is still mad at me: So, no Screencaps yesterday (Saturday) or today. "Screencaps runs 7 days a week." Yeah, my ass it does. What is your excuse these past 2 days, you lazy d–k?
Kinsey: As always, I recommend you guys bookmark the Screencaps landing page.
https://www.foxnews.com/category/outkick/outkick-culture/screencaps
Now, SeanJo was on Sunday Screencaps duty and, for some reason, the post didn't end up on the landing page. Not sure what happened there, but SeanJo definitely showed up for work. He was all over Brooks Nader's night in Baton Rouge.
– Tom T. reacts to Marc's outburst: Wow!! Marc needs to take a chill pill…..my ex-wife said that I had anger issues, and his email made ME feel uncomfortable. I hope he can find peace this weekend (take the heavy dogs today, Marc).
– Richard emails: Joe love the column. First time long time. I was a young lawyer at my father’s law firm in 1997. My wife was 7 months pregnant with our first child I worked primarily for a partner in a 2 lawyer Satelite office who generated a lot of work for the firm and was my dad’s protege. She was going on vacation to Aspen. She told me if X(another lawyer from a different firm) comes to the office and asks for a particular client file give it to her.
So X did come to the office and I gave her the file. When my boss returned from Aspen I popped my head into her office and asked how was your vacation? She was crying. I said what wrong? She said why did you give X the file? I said because that is what you said to do. She said no I didn’t. I said yes you did and you showed me where the file was. She said she didn’t.
So I said well I guess you are calling me a liar. She said yes I am. I said well "F**k you I’m not a liar" and this was in front of her sycophant staff. The partner told my father it was her or me who had to go. My dad backed her so I quit and went home and told my wife I just quit. Started my own firm as a solo which is now a 5 office mid size firm and far far more successful than my former boss and even my father. My dad and I made amends.
Oddly in 30 + year hindsight I think she did tell me NOT to give X the file.
– John H. says: Joey with all this talk of respecting summer I think we need to clarify the geographic demarcation for this movement. The historical Mason Dixon line is too far north. But maybe a line between North and South Carolina, between Tennessee and Georgia, Alabama and Mississippi then deviating south to divide Louisiana and Arkansas.
Most of us south of this line currently have a strong case of summer fatigue which rapidly worsens as we approach mid September. I split time between Miami and Atlanta where summers are similar in magnitude, but vary in length. Miami has 2 seasons - brutal and not so brutal. Atlanta has elements of a spring and autumn, albeit often too short. Since our winters are not as limiting as yours, we understand the sentiment for delaying those dreaded winter months.
So although we acknowledge the "respect summer" mantra, those of us south of the pumpkin spice line are covertly stoked about summer’s departure. Sorry Joe. However you have our full support for summer’s departure NOT being synonymous with Christmas. Let’s enjoy the time between summer and December. I think everyone can agree on that point - whether you’re north or south of the pumpkin spice line.
If this Facebook embed doesn't load, don't kill me. Don't treat me like Marc treats me.
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It's time to go golfing. I've been knocking out projects around the house the last two days, including patio projects, mowing (on Sunday because it rained for five straight days last week) and kicked the ball around with Screencaps the III, who got the book he wanted.
It's time for a little me time. I hope all of you have a great Labor Day. Tonight, you'll get SMU vs. Florida State.
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